Ponder: Back at day one

The other night, I scrubbed away at the dry, hardened skin covering the heels of my feet. My back hurt as I bent over in the bathtub for a long time. Disgusting as this sounds, this proved highly symbolic. After washing and drying my feet, I put on some Burts' Bees Cream and the soft, brightly pink skin on my heels were revealed at long last.

This chore seemed like the first determined action I had made for the year. This preceded weeks of sleeping in, making sandwiches and salad for meals, being indecisive and moving like a sloth, yet snarling around the house regarding the boys' marathon gaming on the Wii and XBox.

This also seemed like an act of finally washing off the hardened shell that grew over the year that passed. I've been adjusting to a new way of working and the changes that come along with it. Over the Christmas holidays, it's the same old routine as in the past 4 years, except that I really got lazy. It was good diet-wise. It meant we were eating just as we usually do, but not loading up with ham, nibbles, oily and salty appetizers, alcohol, creams and cheeses, and the usual party fare that leads to bloating and weight gain.

The blessing of the past holidays though has been the gift of friends. Over the past several weeks, I've realized how beloved we are by friends. Lunches, dinners, meeting for coffees. I should be a little bit more enthusiastic and grateful as I ponder this aspect of my life. 

I have to admit that over the three month period of being absent on this blog, I've become 'sluggish'.  I've acquired bad habits and this has slowed me down--I've been drinking a bit more wine as the year ended; I sleep at almost 2 in the morning. Sleeping earlier than 11 pm is something I need to work at. Another insight: turn off the iPhone by 9 pm.

It also doesn't help that in the last quarter of 2011 I started to wear the splint for my TMJ and now that I'm weaning off it, I've had some hiccups. I can barely eat, since my jaw hurts when I chew, and I've had to eat soup and soft foods.

I've been slow to wake up to 2012. Yesterday, I went to a work meeting and hobbled along. Today, I cooked my sons baked salmon for lunch, a real departure from takeaway sushi, fastfood, or sandwiches of the past weeks and finally prepared some cookie dough ready for baking, a request from Mr. Nest since the Christmas holidays.

I'm coming along, I'm getting on board the 2012 train. Slowly but surely.